Installment 112

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I want to share some things from a prayer on December 22, 2014 (Month 9 Day 29). I began my prayer: Father, I am here. I would like to know what you’re going to share with me.

Later in the prayer, the Divine conveyed:

Now my son, listen.

From that, the Divine again wants me to listen in order to understand in order to do what is communicated. So what will the Divine convey? The Divine continued:

A man of two does not do in small degrees,

So let me ponder that for a moment, because that could seem to indicate that a husband with two wives does things in big, large, huge sweeping actions and moments. As I will show, the prayer is not conveying that.

Up front, one has to accept that any man who has two women is not doing things in small degrees. Look, at this point, I am not addressing ethical responsibilities, I am simply considering the situation where a man has two women – he is not a person who lives in small degrees, he is engaging life in greater degrees.

But it is just as important to mention that when the women accept him and willingly associate with him as he lives with them, neither of those women are living their life in small degrees either.

But THAT is in NO WAY a pejorative against men and women in monogamy, because they themselves might be taking life and living it in greater degrees than some men and women in polygamy.

Yet when it comes to a man with multiple women relationships, marriages, and commitments, he and his ladies are engaging life to no small degree. So consider that the Divine continued:

overboard he is not, but on deck he must be.

It does not escape my notice that God maintains the motif of a ship when conveying these concepts to me.

So the Divine makes it clear with the use of the concept of overboard, that I am not to be careless and carefree. Instead, I am to be on deck, which means responsible and active in my life.

With that, consider that the Divine continued:

Be on deck.

Again the Divine emphasizes that I am to be on deck. That means that I am active. I am seen. I am involved. Then the Divine continued:

Be not ashamed.

Quite frankly, that was something that I struggled with. But no more.

There is no way on this earth that I am going to be shamed by believers who cannot and will not see that the Scriptures do not condemn a marriage with two wives.

So there is no way on this earth that I am going to feel shame when two ladies, through their own volition, choose to be with me.

So I take seriously the next part of the prayer. The Divine continued:

Have the time of your life. Otherwise, really, what’s the point?

Isn’t that really the entire thing? If one gets such a beautiful moment and can’t have the time of their life in that moment, then the moment is wasted.

By moment, I am not talking about brevity of time. I expect my moment to be a beautiful marriage – with two beautiful, loving, spiritual, God-centered women, who willingly want to be with me, willingly want to have a family together, and that our moment lasts as long as God gives us time to travel on this earth.

Back then, in 2014, I found it so difficult to come to terms with myself and what it indicated with those around me. I did hope that I could be me and live life as I was being led and that they would accept me. That does not seem possible.

But I still intend on having the time of my life, because I know where my heart is, and it is for God, the biblical reality of a marriage with a man and wives, which is why I will do what is next in the prayer. The Divine conveyed:

Be responsible, be wise, be a teacher,

Three qualities that any Godly wife wants in her husband: responsibility, wisdom, giving instruction, things that I plan on continuing.

But consider that the Divine continued:

but live life. Live it, it is yours to enjoy. So live life.

That, my reader, has been the most difficult thing to accept. That I am permitted by the Divine to actually LIVE life, that I can enjoy it. That was so difficult to believe because I was taught that life must be lived but enjoying life was not proper.

I won’t discuss it to any extreme detail, it’s just that the religious heritage I came from was like many other Christian heritages, when a Christian enjoyed their life, it probably meant that they were sinning, therefore it was best and wisest not to ever “enjoy” life.

Yet my prayers, my studies, have revealed that God created life to be enjoyed and lived. And that is exactly what I want and will do. So it is important that the Divine also conveyed:

Now my son, your wives want to see your smiling face, so smile, you have a lot to live for.

It took me a long time, a long time, to have my smile. But I smile, because I am grateful, grateful that I get to participate in a beautiful marriage.

I have a lot to live for. I love my wife Mary. Even though I’ve never met her, I love my wife-to-be. Why? Because I can’t help it, I am a guy living in larger degrees, and I can’t help but smile, while I work on deck.

*Looks up from his writing space, looking out across the deck of his ship, across the bow to the horizon, the sun is rising, the skies are bright blue, the winds favor the ship, smiling at the beautiful destination ahead.*

Blessings and Shalom