26. My attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability.

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my attack thoughts are attacking my invulnerability.

some background, some time ago, don’t recall when or where, i learned that what i project causes me to experience that projection, which taught me that if i thought of my self as a certain thing, then that certain thing is how others “saw” me. counterintuitive, but lesson learned.

so i engage this lesson having learned the lesson previously but through a different avenue, yet i interact with this as if this were the first time to learn this.

the lesson:
a truth: if i can be attacked, then i am not invulnerable. therefore a potential attack becomes a real threat.

but that is because i currently believe that i can “attack” some thing.

oddly, because i engage life by presenting and sending my “attack” thoughts to the world, then i myself interpret myself as being “attacked” and thus live fearful of being “attacked”.

that conveys that if i fear “attack” then i believe i am vulnerable.

yet, what i am facing is my thoughts and sights. i am thinking “attack” therefore i am “seeing” attack which makes me feel vulnerable, but it is my thoughts and sights that make me feel vulnerable.

causally, fear of being “attacked” and concept of invulnerability contrast each other, and because they oppose each other, one is accepted by my mind while the other is rejected.

counterintuitively, the reality is that before anyone “attacks” my own being, i have “attacked” my self via my “attack” thoughts.

when i “attack” my self through my thoughts, i lead my self to believe that i am vulnerable, compromised, to being “attacked”, which means that no real “attack” has yet to occur to me but internally, in my mind, i certainly made a reality that i am weak and therefore perceive my self as being “attacked” because i perceive my self as weak, which means that my own “attack” thoughts weakened my own self. as such, because my thoughts weakened my self, i can no longer believe in my self, which means a i have created a false thought image about my self.

consequently, my own thoughts create what i believe, whether i am vulnerable or i am invulnerable.

since, my thoughts make me either vulnerable or invulnerable, then it is my thoughts which must either establish me as either vulnerable or invulnerable.

consider the following:
i am concerned about the computer.
i am afraid the computer will not start.
i am afraid the computer will not work.
i am afraid the computer will not save my work.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about the car.
I am afraid the car will not start.
i am afraid the car will not have gas.
i am afraid the car will not help me get to where i am going.
i am afraid the car will be in an accident.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about the building.
i am afraid the building will be haunted.
i am afraid the building will be cold.
i am afraid the building will be hot.
i am afraid the building will make me feel closed in.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about the music.
i am afraid the music will be something i don’t like.
i am afraid the music will convey something i don’t prefer.
i am afraid the music will be too loud.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about the ideas.
i am afraid the ideas might cause people to something i don’t like.
i am afraid the ideas might persuade people to the wrong conclusions.
i am afraid the ideas might convey wrong things.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about the words.
i am afraid that words will be used wrong.
i am afraid that words will be used to hurt others.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about politics.
i am afraid that politics will be used to control others.
i am afraid that politics will be used to uphold lying.
i am afraid that politics will be used to uphold stealing.
i am afraid that politics will be used to hurt people.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about religion.
i am afraid that religion will be used to control others.
i am afraid that religion will be used to uphold lying.
i am afraid that religion will be used to uphold stealing.
i am afraid that religion will be used to hurt people.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

i am concerned about money.
i am afraid that money will be used to control others.
i am afraid that money will be used to uphold lying.
i am afraid that money will be used to uphold stealing.
i am afraid that money will be used to hurt people.
difficulty, each of those thoughts from my own mind and serve as an “attack” upon my self.

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